Feeling Lost

Have you ever broken up with somebody or had a falling out with a friend and thought “But now who am I? What is it I even enjoy? Do I have any passions of my own?” ⁠

Most of my life I’ve had the habit of adopting the interests and passions of the people I’ve been closest to. Not that I didn’t have hobbies of my own, I just became so smitten that I was more interested in what they liked most about life. I guess you could say my hobby was “the other”. ⁠

It was around when I quit my corporate job that I first really recognized this. Even though I’d been single for a while and felt fully realized as an individual (I wasn’t, but I felt that way), after I quit I was suddenly and painfully without the distraction of full time work and the money to fund my favorite pastime, bars and restaurants. I felt totally lost. Desperate. Confused. Alone. ⁠

I’m telling you this because, well, in the age of COVID-19, nobody’s got bars and restaurants right now and a lot of us don’t have jobs, either, so I’m thinking some of you might identify with this feeling. Who am I? What is it I even enjoy? Now that I have all the time I complained I never had, I don’t even know how to fill it. ⁠

Rest easy, is my advice. If you haven’t already, give yourself some guilt-free time to do nothing important. Key word: guilt-free. ⁠
(I took a lot of naps…) ⁠

Rest easy, and listen. When you get one of those wild-hair ideas don’t judge it and just go about trying to do it. ⁠
(My random idea was “I want to learn to lucid dream.”)⁠

Rest easy, listen, and trust. Trust that going with it in this way will lead to answers to the questions.⁠
(My progression: I enjoy sleeping > I enjoy lucid dreaming inductions > I enjoy meditating > I enjoy yoga.)⁠

Has this resonated with you? Have you been through a similar process of discovery? Do you need help getting started? I’m here for you.